Sunday, June 28, 2009

Mr. & Mrs. Hall discuss sex or lack thereof (HISTORIC POST UPDATE)


The night before ....


It's four in the morning something when wakes us up. All the way up. Gotta pee then try not to walk into walls as we zombie walk to bed kind of up. Back in bed, I close my eyes and immediately start REM sleeping. Then, I am yanked back to reality by two distinct sighs. They sound kind of like bow-chicka-wah-wow.

FOUR IN THE GODDAMN MORNING.

We were sleeping! Dead asleep. Snoring, dreaming, drool on the pillow asleep. We were woken accidentally, we just used the bathroom. Back in bed in less than 3 minutes flat. And we just had a rousing round of the maritals-less than six hours before.

Yet, there it was, the very distinct set of sighs. There would be no slumber.

Mr. Hall: "Ahh, yeah, I think it’s business time."

It boggles the mind, the male sex drive.

The next night, we have this discussion.

Mrs. Hall: So, what do guys do between girlfriends? I mean, what do men do with all that energy?

Mr. Hall: What do you mean?

Mrs. Hall: Well, what do men do between girlfriends with, um, the energy. I know for you, well being around me, it's worse than baseline because well, you love me like you do. It's more than sex drive that drives you crazy for me. And well, you have really been thoughtful and have only had sex with women you loved. So what do other men do with the energies?

Mr. Hall: (a shit eating grin appears)

Bar sluts

Mrs. Hall: JEFF!!! THAT’S NOT NICE TO SAY!! I mean, these energies are ridiculous. Have you ever sought out, um, a bar slut? I mean, that's so sad, those women, ug, they are women with feelings. gaaah.

Mr. Hall: Nah, noone would want to do that sort of thing, I mean, bars are full of women but, ug, the smoke, the skank factor alone . . . .

Mrs. Hall: So what then, what do men do? I mean it’s so sad, ‘to just take care of it’, I mean that’s so sad.

Mr. Hall: Yeah, kind of. But, ya do what ya gotta do.

Mrs. Hall: Well, then, your’re lucky you have me.

Mr. Hall: Lucky indeed.

And then, well, It was business time . .




HISTORIC POST UPDATE:

Mr. Hall made the very first genuine comments in the comments below. Comments there were neither provoked or translated through Mrs. Hall. And yes, everything he says is true. kissess smooches Mr. Hall ;)

12 Left a message at the beep:

James said...

What do women do between boyfriends? I mean, women have "energies" too don't they?

OK, I am sure my first wife didn't have any. Ever.

Anonymous said...

MrHall wishes that to maintain journalistic integrity 1)MrsHall deny the implication from above video that MrH might be a "minuteman" 2)MrsH deny ever having said "is that it?" to MrH 3)MrsH confirms the existence of the multiple female 'O' as given by MrH.

Mrs. Hall said...

James: Yeah, women are different really. We don't produce a million sperm a day, just drop and egg once a month. That being said, the energies aren't as urgent and more emotional based. Plus,

well

we can get a guy at the drop of a hat. Even if we are ugly.


so really. this takes care of it!

Mrs. Hall said...

Anon:




WELL THIS IS NICE!!


MARK IT ON YOUR CALENDAR FOLKS!

MR. HALL SPEAKS FOR THE FIRST TIME.


WITHOUT PROVOCATION OR TRANSLATION THROUGH MRS. HALL!!

love ya babe!! :)

Big Pissy said...

You and Mr. Hall are just too cute for words. :)

James said...

aah you young things you.

Mrs. Hall said...

Pissy: i swear it's like my birthday him commenting!


James: yeah, so fun :)

sorry your first wife was such a um, non energy having person.

:)

Caz said...

haha LOVE flight of the conchords.
Am i completely abnormal in having more...er...energies than The Band?
I am the only woman I know with this problem. Dam it sucks.

white rabbit said...

How unlike the home life of our own dear Queen - or so they say...

I would have thought it was obvious what men do between relationships but I am far too delicate to say.

GeologyJoe said...

i see nothing odd about any of this. enjoy it while it works is my philosophy. probably because my grandfather told me when I was 13, 'when your my age its like playing pool with a piece of rope.'

and my dad: 'do it now, cause once you hit 40, it ain't up every day.'

Cam said...

Mr Hall SPEAKS!!

and, I freakin missed it...

So cool, Mr Hall...

So cool!
:)

Mrs. Hall said...

Caz: Very awesome for you and the band!


Well Hello Blanco, I hoped you enjoyed your visit at la casa de Mrs. Hall, do stop by again soon and bring the english touch with you.


BLUE: OR YOU COULD JUST GET A GIRLFRIEND

GeoJoe: yeah, wee shall see, Mr. Hall is almost forty now.

Cam: You didn't miss it, the blog, it waits for you! :)

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