The Interview Experiment (redux)

I believe it's high time to resurrect the Interview Experiment. Read my interview (now with fresh updates) then go to the end to get yours!

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I have been interviewed by Mr. Verdant Dude, formerly known as Mr. Bug Eyed Earl. (yeah Earl!)

question one: How ya handling the winter so far in "Super Duper"?

It sucks ass.

UPDATE: I LOVE LIVING HERE!!! CAUSE THIS IS MY BACK YARD YO!

question two: You've only been on Blogger for about a year (update-it's been like two years now). What inspired you to start blogging?

I have of lot of involuntary creative energy. Specifically, a writer's energy. It is a driving force, a veritable pipeline. It is there every day, the buzzing words, the sentences writing themselves out in my head.

It has been part of me for as long as I can remember.When I was little, I loved to write stories and poems. Diving into big words, lounging in their sound before I could fasten a bra. I have had a few things published in local journal type publications. Mostly poems.

Oddly enough, I was never a journal keeper or a big reader. Except for autobiographies. I use to read two a week. This is how I found the blogosphere. That was a long time ago.

I would have started a blog then, but I was busy. The energy was diverted by school/work/mom/wife tasks, but in June 2008, I graduated with my master's and became a grown up Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner. With school out of the way, my muse to became insistent and mouthy. She insists I work out who I am and what I feel. And tell my story. And I agree with her. Hence the birth of this blog.

THANK YOU FOR READING MY STORY!

WE REALIZE THAT YOU HAVE LOTS OF CHOICES IN THE BLOGOSPHERE, THANK YOU FOR CHOOSING TO FLY AIR HALL!

three: What can you tell us about the other two blogs that you contribute to ? What percentage of your blogging time is devoted to each of your blogs?(update-i don't contribute anymore cause i'm selfish)

Bonez is the first blog I contributed to. It is run by a very nice guy named Tony. It is sort a think tank blog. Very eclectic.

I have contributed other pieces to that blog. But, now that my career has picked up, I can barely keep up with this blog. It is nice though, publishing somewhere else. It changes what you write. It is always good to grow.

Thems' private thoughts was a one time only guest post. It was a contest to write a holiday post. Thank you James for inviting me! It's fun to play with others!

four: Do you ever yearn to go back to the punk look of your youth? Got any pics from back then you wanna post? Or from when you were a nude model? (Just kidding about the last one...kinda)

No, no urge to relive the punk years. Not in hair cut form or in life style choices. It is a relief, when the crazy ends. and breathe . . . .

As far as the art (from when I was a nude model) I am sure it's out there. My body has been reproduced in chalk, acrylic and oil pant. There are sculptures, photography and videography too. There is a lot of stuff out there, if the artist(s) kept any of it.

I can honestly say I was an awesome model. I was clearly the most request. I thrived in that setting really. I could hold difficult and interesting poses for 45 minutes. The short poses were a chance to dance in place for 2 minutes at time. I started out as an artist so I knew how to use the angles of my body, how to inspire people.

My favorite classes to pose for, were the continuing ed. classes for seniors. They were always so nice. So dedicated to their craft. They gave me such respect and encouragement. AND they would bring me cookies! I miss all those old ladies and gents. It was so avant garde, so sophisticated, so safe with them. I was encouraged to become living art, by seasoned artists.

There is magic to being a nude model for life drawing classes. The artist takes your image and filters it through their imagination and their skill level. You are a muse. It is every bit as awesome as it sounds.

five: I'm glad to see you've included "zombies" as one of your interests on your profile page. Care to change your thoughts on heading to Vegas when the zombies attack? De-composed flesh in that heat would be a bit stinky!

No.

I would head to Las Vegas so I could pursue my other life long dream. To be a performer in the Cirque De Solei. Which Cirque show? you say!

Why O of course! My life would dissolve into pure magic. :)

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If you would like to be interviewed by me, and really, why wouldn't you?

1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me." or email me: butcher(dot)hollow(at)gmail
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions.
3. You will update your blog (and I'll update mine) with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Warning: it may take a heck of a long time to send you five questions but dammit, as God as my witness, it will be done!!!

The Elixir of Beauty

There . . . now that's better, isn't it?

Have a good weekend all :)

Mr. Hall & Mrs. Hall discuss mating habits

Here's a funky little conversation I had with Mr. Hall.

Mr. Hall: Did you hear about those Eagles in Alaska?

Mrs. Hall: (suspiciously) Wait, is this story going to be like that story you told me about a person's hand size . . . that if their hand is bigger than their face they're really smart?

ed. note:

YES I FELL FOR THAT.

SHUT UP!!!!!!!!!

Mr. Hall: (laughing) No! No! That was funny though. I could have been a lot meaner with that. I barely pushed your hand by the way. No, this is a real story, you can look it up on CNN.* But, did you know Eagles mate in mid air?

Mrs. Hall: Weird.

Mr. Hall: Yeah, I know. It's a big deal in Alaska, tourists pay a lot of money to watch the mating habits. Apparently, there was mating couple who fell out of the sky. There were going at it and became oblivious to gravity. They fell and smashed right into a snowbank. The male eagle died but the female lived. She's injured though, rehabbing in some wildlife facility.

Mrs. Hall: WOAH!

Mr. Hall: Yeah, tell me about it. See, now, I totally get that. It's just crazy while things are going down, for guys I mean. I can totally understand becoming oblivious to gravity. It's just nutz for guys. I mean, all I gotta say to the male Eagle is, 'yeah, I feel ya buddy.'


END

*And sure enough HERES the story.

Revelations from the road (or) Acres of Concrete Chaos

I recently spent four days at a work conference. Which sparked the following post.



In my life, I am never alone nor alone for long. On the road, I noted a glaring lack of demand on my person and time. I marveled at my table for one while polishing an entire magazine. Walking about, without holding a little one’s hand, my gait settled and slowed. Then I was startled by the sound of my own thoughts. Then I heard them in full sentences.

At first I was bewildered by this. Then I started recognizing my freedom. Free from the ties that bind. Last time I felt absolute freedom was in college. I was a young girl with short shorn hair, tied up like tail pipes. Feral, happy, little tailpipes. Running all over campus, becoming a nurse. That was the last time I was truly alone. It was ten years ago.

The days wore on. My feelings grew odder, then grew into lead. They lined the pockets of my peacoat and strained the hem of my skirt. Without my tribe, I felt temporarily disappeared. Which is to say I was very sad. Then I ordered two martinis at the bar. This helped a little.



The next day, I decided to get out of the hotel. My goal was to walk and see the sights. The big city had huge skyscrapers, acres of concrete chaos which left my eyes round. But the absence of Mr. Hall was killing me. My arms ached to hold him. My ribs missed his weight. My mouth craved his ear to whisper my awe.

In the end, I recognized the utter lack of balance in my life. The last vacation I had was three years ago. There is no excuse for this other than self neglect. I need to guard against the inertia that constant need creates. Guard against it like a junk yard dog. I have gobs of vacation time saved up. It’s high time Mr. Hall and I used it.

So we will go. I will wear high heels and a low cut dress. I will be his hot wife, fawning all over my man. Blowing on his dice because baby needs a new pair of shoes. We will get drunk and giggle till my cheeks get red. We will get a room with two beds. Because The Tribe Called Hall started with us. It’s time to tend the roots.

Guess what I'm doing for the next three days, go ahead, guess

I'm going away.

I'm going to a psychiatric conference. Which means I will leave from work tomorrow and drive 3 hours to a very BIG BIG city. Driving without kids in the backseat. Which is weird. I'm driving all by myself with maps. I have a hotel booked and everything. Booked it all by myself even.

I've never been to a conference before. But, to keep up my license up, I need continuing education hours. This will be 18 hours all told. Plus my work reimburses me for the conference and hotel/travel. I should have padded the travel expenses more.

This is so boring to talk about. I apologize. I mean, the conference itself should be interesting. But, it's all technical stuff. Neurotransmitters and whatnot. Doesn't translate well into blog form. Plus, I'm not paying for internet access so I am off the grid for three days. And I don't have internet on my phone cause I'm cheep.

CHEEP I SAY!

So you don't get to hear about it anyway.

ME NO LIKEY NO PUTER AND NO BLOGGY BLOG!!! ME NO LIKEY NO FACEBOOK!!

Plus, the thing is, is that, it just feels so odd. I mean, I will be without husband and children for three days. I've never really been without everyone. I already feel lonely about it. I mean, I'll be a solo member of the Tribe called Hall. Gallivanting about. It's so weird to think about.

ME NO LIKEY BEING SOLO TRIBE MEMBER!!

Who I am suppose to put on time outs? Whose socks am I suppose to hunt for? Who I am suppose to spoon at night? I mean, I'll call Mr. Hall through out the day but, gah.

Crap. Am I really this needy? Have I no identity outside of Mrs. Hall-- wife, mother nurse and friend?

I will be extremely busy though. Attending presentation after presentation. Learning things. Being all professional and such. I won't be going out after the long days though. I will be sticking to the the hotel. No need for met to venture out after the days are done. Lone single female in a big city after all. Safety first.

I'll get room service.

Stare at the cable television.

Maybe I'll bring booze to the hotel room. Is it bad to drink alone?

It's all so weird.

OK, that's all I got.

Wish me luck as I do something I've never done before.

The drive home

From the drive home today.

Home, showered and all snuggled.

It was a really great Easter gathering. My spirit is freer and my laughter is coming back. Mr. Hall is less sad too. He's smiling a lot easier.

The kids are the best elixir.

Thanks for the kind wishes everyone.

Mangoes on Good Friday

Thanks for all the thoughts, prayers and hugs. Really, I mean that.

I was eating a mango tonight and it was phenomenal. It caused these seizures of sweetness to ricochet in my mouth.

Which made me sad because food tastes so good now. Because I no longer have morning sickness. All the nausea and exhaustion has vaporized. I miss them. Because they meant baby on board.

Then I said to Mr. Hall, "I really don't want to go to your sister's for Easter. Everyone is going to ask how I am. And try to hug me. What can I say to them?"

Then he said, "Tell them you cried a bout a half an hour ago, so you're about to cry anytime now."

This was very funny. I laughed, really I did. I laughed because I have been crying in this spouting spurts. It's happening everywhere. When I was pushing my son on the swings, at the park, while I was laughing with him as he giggled and flew o so high, I started blubbering. When I was filling my car with gas, I started sobbing. When I was buying those mangoes, I cried a bit too.

These are short bursts though. Sudden little storms. I can pass them quickly. Pass them off as allergies as I wipe my eyes. They are reflective of the sadness that is there underneath all of this. Sadness is our new companion. It's never far. Mr. Hall feels it to. Feels it just like I do.

Then it hit me.

This sadness is like the morning sickness. It's a sign the baby was here. Only the baby is not here anymore. Now we, Mr. Hall and I, just have this sadness. And we promised to be sad together.

And thinking about the sadness, thinking of it like morning sickness, is really, really comforting. I'm not sure if that sounds strange but it's so comforting to hold this sadness now. It lets me welcome the sadness, it lets me feel all natural about it.

It's a gift, this sadness. And with our sad we honor our loss. And thinking about it like that, fills me with all sorts of hope.

Needless to say, those were some mangoes.