Bumping uglies on film

Editor's note: This is not as coherent as I want it to be. But, some of the charm is the messiness, no?

Everyday I get hits on this post. It is about Hugh Hefner's girlfriends from the Playboy mansion. I feel bad about this. People must come to those posts looking for fluffy stuff. Also, I am not such a blog.

I get even more hits on this. It is about Jenna Jameson. They were two of my first posts. There is a whole backlog of topics I need to write about. Porn included. My writer's queue if you will.

In my head, I debate and dissect things like porn. After all, it is good to think about the hobbies of husbands. Mr. Hall was the first man I dated who claimed not to be a feminist, but a lesbian trapped in a man's body. I find him very funny.

To begin, I must attest that I am not a hater of porn, just mystified by it.

I think porn can be broken down into subcategories. There is gentle soft stuff and ugly, oooo so ugly stuff. It becomes intolerable to me, the more disconnected the actors are. Have you noticed that people in porn rarely make eye contact? Well, perhaps you have never seen the faces. It seems copious amount of screen acreage must be filled with genitals in pornographic films. I don't understand this. Genitals are not that attractive.

And you know what else you don't see in porn? People smiling. Unless it is a creepy smile. Is no one having fun? There is also a lack of enjoying each other, beyond the bumping uglies. I believe it is very false. Does anyone find the big fake boobies and bleached hair and horse teeth attractive? Seriously, who looks at Pamela Anderson and thinks, wow, she is attractive. But that is whole nother post.

There are production companies that specialize in gentle, female centered films. There are whole companies under the label, "feminist porn". I am not sure this is an oxymoron. I can't help but reference Nina Hartley here. She is a fellow nurse. She never worked as nurse though, just graduated as one.

Maybe this is where the responsibility is where it should be. It is like anything we consume. You can get crap filled with nefarious fillings at McDonald's. Or, you can seek out the higher road. And tastier fare.