Tuesday, September 1, 2009

And this is me when I talk all crazy like



I've been very splintered as of late. My time is getting all demanded on.

The blog, it suffers from my usual well crafted content and stark revelations. I feel kind of bad for it. It just sitting here. Waiting for me. le sigh.

And my real life conversations are just getting crazier. Luckily, my husband never skips a beat.

Let's listen in to this ditty heard in the car yesterday.

Mrs. Hall: (gently rubs eyes) Ugh, even my eyelids are all sore. My face was all tense and scrunched last night. I really hate it when you tell me to hush. It messes things up. Not being able to make noise traps the energy, messing up my "O" feng shui. My arms are all sore from bracing against the stupid nightstand too. ugh.

Mr. Hall: yeah, I know. I don't like telling you to shush. Damn cheap house with the thin walls. But next time loosen your face a bit. It's kind of like getting in a car crash, you need to go limp to survive. That's how people don't break bones, and avoid injury, they just go limp. If you fight it and brace yourself, you're just going to get hurt. You need to go limp. (winks)

Mrs. Hall: What? What the hell? How do you know this? I've been in like two car accidents and wait, no, I was was just hit by a car. Does backing into stuff count as accidents? huh. Um, if we get a gas stove can you install it in the new house?

Silence.

More silence.

Mr. Hall looks over at his wife. Looks at her like she's nuts. Wife tilts head in response, all curious like.


Mr. Hall: Ah, yeah. I installed the gas stove at our old house.

Mrs. Hall: What??!! Really???!! How did I not know this? I mean, was I there? I really like these new shoes. All cute and girly. What do you think of the name Hunter? They really fit well. Do you think we can buy some fancy patio furniture for the new house? They're a bit bit sassy too.

Mr. Hall: Yes. I enjoy when you dress up a bit.

(He reaches over for her hand as they drive down the road).

3 Left a message at the beep:

the queen said...

Gary always just muffled me with a pillow.

Heff said...

Muffle with a pillow. Yep.

Mrs. Hall said...

Queen: Then he couldn't do that stuff that he does with his um, hands. tee hee hee

Heff: See what i said above.

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