Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Mr. and Mrs. Hall discuss his pern stash



Mrs. Hall: So, was looking through your "Hmm" folder.

Mr. Hall: Oh? (smiles)

Mrs. Hall: My question is, why do you have so many files, so many images and movies?

Mr. Hall: Well, I haven't had a chance to weed through them lately. But, it takes a lot of looking to find good porn.

Mrs. Hall: What makes good porn for you?

Mr. Hall: Well, it's really a matter of the end result. What the images provoke in terms of fantasies, feelings... I can tell you what I don't like all day . . .but . .

Mrs. Hall: The big fakins is no good. Where the skin is all rippled around the cantaloupes.

Mr. Hall: Yeah, no good. I like the more amateur stuff, less porn-ey that way. Less professional women who make their mouths gape, making that grunting noise, (he grunts, sticking his tongue out-grabs his chest all fake porn actress like)

Mrs. Hall: What's with all the barely legal stuff though?

Mr. Hall: The women haven't had a chance to get all fake and stripper shoes. There's not all that stupid branded tattoos, more geniune. That's what I like, geniune. I like the couple stuff, the amatuer stuff. Where the people look like they're loving each other.

Mrs. Hall: Huh. Well. You have a lot of women produced films, feminist porn and such. And I can be very thankful I didn't find any guy on guy stuff . . . .

Mr. Hall: THERE IS NO WAY MAN ON MAN PORN will be in the pile. Now, GILF stuff . . .

Mrs. Hall: GILF?

(Mr. Hall says nothing, then I sound out the words in my head.)

Mrs. Hall: GROSS!!!!!!

Mr. Hall: NAH! Just kiddin', NOGILF! There are some videos with guys in vinyl masks, whips and donkeys even.

Mrs. Hall: KNOCK IT OFF!! There is not!!

Mr. Hall: I have some hidden midget files.

Mrs. Hall: SHUT UP!!! STOP PLANTING IMAGES IN MY HEAD!!

15 Left a message at the beep:

Heff said...

OH, YESTH ! PERN !!!

Hey, why is my word verification "Whack" ???

Mrs. Hall said...

Whack?!! HAHHAA!!! CLASSIC!!!

Mrs. Hall said...

Mr. Hall would like me to repeat: there IS NO GILF on the hard drive.

Heff said...

It's probably full of Gianna Michaels. I know mine is.

Mrs. Hall said...

see now, now I'm gonna have to google to see who that is.

IT BETTER BE GOOD!!!

cause if it's GILF I SWEAR TO GOD HEFF!!! I WILL SMITE THEE!!

Heff said...

Nah, Heff watches the GOOD PORN, LOL !

Mrs. Hall said...

Wow. Mr. Hall new that pernstar!

Bruce Johnson said...

More couples need to have this conversation.......hilarious.

As for myself....I prefer the stuff from the 1950 and 1960s. Old school, more mature and rubineque......now that the stuff that gets lotus' blood a-boilin.

Mrs. Hall said...

Yes. There is something 2 be said about vintage.:)

Heff said...

Hell yeah he knew...OMG ! Heff's googling for MORE "PERN" !!!!

Verdant Earl said...

Funny, when I first saw the title of this post I thought it was about a mustache that Mr. Hall was growing. A 70's "porn 'stache", as it were.

But this is even better!

Mrs. Hall said...

yes, this is a classic post in the making!

:)

Slyde said...

i cant watch the vintage stuff.

The women all look like they need to call a Landscaping service for their nether regions...

But i agree that the amatuer stuff is pretty hotsy totsy.

Mrs. Hall said...

yeah, I agree. the 70's were not an excellent decade for grooming the nether regions. ggah.

OK good discussion about porn and it's subgenres everyone!

keep it up!

(hee hee pun intended ;)

Heff said...

I DO agree with Slyde. All my 70's and 80's porn VHS tapes grew hair on themselves !

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