Wax on/wax off, the sex face and killing Zombies that were Left 4 Dead

It happens every time when I get my eyebrows waxed.

I lay down on a table, close my eyes and relax my hands. I deep breathe and repeat the word "bird" over and over in my brain. It is a mantra to relax me.

Yet, every damn time, it happens.

First, the girl takes a cotton ball and smooths the hair with rubbing alcohol. Then I see her stirring the wax with a popsicle stick. I close my eyes. I feel the warm, hot wax coat my lower brow. It grips the skin and I feel tugging while she smooths it on. Then she takes muslin cloth and smooths that down, pressing hard with her index fingers.

At this point my eyes have teared up. Only my eyes are shut, so the tears are gunky and gluey. My eyelids are cemented to my eyeballs.

RIP!!!

I try not to flinch but my whole body jerks. I pry open my eyes. My gluey tears spill out like a bucket of hot baby oil was kicked over.

This is repeated RIP!!!
three RIP!!!
moreRIP!!!

times to finish waxing the brows of Mrs. Hall.

It's embarrassing. And despite my deep breathing and mantras IT JUST KEEPS HAPPENING!! I mean, it's not that painful. I have no idea what the hell my deal is with this.

And the women that wax my brows? They often have a look of horror/concern on their faces. And I try to explain, that really, I'm just a wuss. A scaredy cat. No cause for alarm.

The woman last night, she didn't react this way. She just smiled gently. And she was really kind. She wiped my tears and said, it's ok, we are almost done.

It's ok, we are almost done, she said.

And when she painted my toes, she was really kind. She spent a good 15 minutes creating little flower designs on my toes. She didn't hurry or linger. It was just the right amount of attention. Which is the hard part for me, during these appointments. The attention.

It is most difficult during the pedicure. While tending to the toes, the women often massage the foot/lower leg. I have to consciously relax during this. Massage has a paradoxical effect on me.

It tenses me. gaaahh... touching .... gaaahhh... stranger ...... And I don't want to appear LIKE THE FREAK I AM WHO DOESN'T LIKE MASSAGES so I just really try to stay calm and nice. And quiet.

Above all, I try to stay quiet. Which, considering she didn't really speak English, was not that hard.

But, when I was tearing up during the wax, it set off real sadness. Real tears on the inside. I think she sensed that and was really nice to me. Not nice in a 'I'm doing this for the tips' kind of way but really nice. She took care while she tended to me.

Then I came home and was really nice to Mr. Hall. He was playing one of his favorite computer games, Left 4 Dead. Which involves killing Zombies. I gave him a thorough scalp, neck and shoulder message. All while he killed Zombies.



Lots and lots and lots of Zombie killing to be had in that game.



This game is a group type game. Each player is part of a team. You log on and join in. It is very interesting listening to the chatter of other players, hearing Australian or German accents. But, you work as a team, going around killing zombies, helping bandage each other up when somebody gets shot.



Helping each other out is essential, you can't survive any other way.



Mr. Hall speaks softly while killing scores and scores of Zombies. It's like he's in a meditative trance. He really must like this game. After all, the entire time, when chasing and shooting with his hands on the keyboard, he kept making sex faces. The kind of faces he makes, well, the kind of faces he makes while being very nice to me ;)