Monday, July 30, 2012

it all started @ 2.53 am this morning


so i woke up and for lands sake i had to go potty. only i couldn't wake myself up because it was the third time i woke up that night. it was like try to surface from deep sea diving. i made it though. then i got out of bed and my horizontal hold shifted in a see-saw pattern. I made it though. And that's all that matters.

It's been about a month since I slept through the night. offt.

then i woke up at 5.30 and decided to screw working out i'm tired.

6.50. Woke up too late to make breakfast, needed to hit the mcdonalds. every time i order a medium latte and an egg mcmuffin. EVERY TIME I ORDER IT'S AN ORDEAL FOR THE GIRL TAKING MY ORDER. The egg mcmuffin part is ok, she gets that. But ordering a medium latte is akin to speaking Chinese appearently.

It's 7 am now.


"No, a medium latte please".


"Um, no, I would like a medium latte please."

I don't want a coffee, I want a medium latte. Latte is french for milk. Which is steamed and put into a delicious coffee beverage. Which the girl has never head of despite it being on the menu. RIGHT THERE. UNDER THE WORD LATTE.

Frustrated, I slam my hand down on the steering wheel because I have to do this every.single.time. I realize I look like crazy person but noone can see my hands so it doesn't count. And I don't snap at the McDonald's coffee girl because I'm better than that.

7.35. I get to work and the door is locked. Mondays and Tuesdays are my days at a tiney tiny clinic. With a security guard about the same age as Grandpa Simpson. His hearing aid is constantly high pitched humming. He forgot to unlock the door.

SO. I am noticing something lately. Like everyone else in this world I have an inner voice. However, my filter for this voice is becoming very weak and very useless the more pregnant I become.

So i'm outside the door yelping "FOR GOD'S SAKE!!! STUPID DOOR IS LOCKED!!!"


My crazy person is on full display.

The clinic is tiny and the walls are thin and everyone inside has heard me.

Someone opens the door and smiles at me. Luckily they like me and just laugh off my crazy.

7.37 My tailbone starts to throb as I sit down. My eyes feel like sandpaper. I can't breathe and the stomach acid is splashing around in the back of my throat. I open my email to learn I am officially in the third trimester.

Which is awesome really.

I mean, the baby is getting so big he's literally moving organs out of his way. I can feel him so much lately. All kung fu fighting in there. I can't help but feel so happy and proud of my belly. He has about 2 more months to cook and then, God willing, he'll be in our arms, nursing and snuggling.

Then I'll get my body back. And start to sleep through the night again.

oh wait.


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