1. My sensitivity
I am the most sensitive person the planet right now. Any side eye, teasing or gentle poking feels super harsh. Especially if the teasing involves things I'm passionate about.
(see that, didn't know I was bilingual did ya?)
I recently became a Lifetime Weight Watchers member. Which means I've made my goal weight and kept it off for six weeks. I don't have to pay for meetings anymore. Unless I gain the weight back of course. I've also applied to become a WW receptionist because I need to pay this forward!
Which brings us to yesterday, surrounded by my coworkers in the break room. I really like my coworkers. I tell them all of the above. I tell them how fun it was applying for this job. It was super fun coming up with a mini resume that included all my accomplishments. I have a master's degree and I'm a nurse practitioner. I'm a married mom of three and a foster mom too. And let's NOT forget the cross fit I kick ass at.
Yes I put crossfit on a resume. UNDER HOBBIES. BOOM SHAKALAKA!!
I tend to forget how much I've done and am. I give all the glory to GOD! I did none of this by myself. I'm a lazy and bossy individual. My strength is puny and inconsistent. His strength works through me. PRAISE HIS NAME!!!
I don't share that last part, with my coworkers, but they known I'm a Jesus freak. So, I don't need to cover that.
THEN. I tell them that you need to be a lifetime WW member or be within 10 lbs of your goal weight to be a WW receptionist. They start to cackle and poke. They say, "So if you gain 11 lbs you're fired?" Or, "There's a weight requirement? THAT'S DISCRIMINATION!" I try to answer back that it makes sense for healthier people to lead. They continue to cackle and joke. I leave the room and try not to cry.
I don't think people have any fricking clue how much work goes into weight loss. I've spent the last frigging year rearranging everything I know about food. I've changed everything and thrived. I did this while in the thick of having five kids! Two of them being high need foster kids!
So. They were just kidding. But I'm hypersensitive. And I was being prideful. Pride goeth before a fall they say.
But, I probably won't work my sensitivity. Screw it. Empathy is a golden gift. I'm almost 40 years old. My empathy is only getting deeper.
Wednesday, August 26, 2015
1. My sensitivity